I am not sure how to explain what I have been feeling lately. It's been six months since I moved here and I don't have much experience in being an expat, but sometimes, I really miss being home. I miss my friends and family and the familiar places I used to go to. I even miss the difference in culture sometimes. Not feeling weird because I make myself a peanut butter + jelly sandwich. Or getting weird looks for going into a restaurant and eating alone because I crave Thai food. Those things, after a while, tend to weigh on a person. And make you miss home. I suppose though, that these feelings are normal. I don't like to admit that I get homesick. After all, the decision to be here was completely all mine. So, homesick to me seems like I'm whining. In the beginning I didn't feel much homesickness. It still felt like a vacation... until about a month ago.
It would make more sense if things weren't going as wonderfully as they have been. I have officially completed the semester as a teacher! Which has been such a gratifying feeling to see the already high saturated minds of high school students learn from me and show progress in the course of the semester. I am more eager for next semester! As for the boyfriend, it still feels like a dream and I am really blessed! I have seen some really amazing places since I've been here. A couple of sessions have really made me fall in love with my couples, they really make doing what I do such a blessing! And, I've become a regular at a local cafe, which makes me feel special when they call me by my name. I also get to go home in four days! Which could be the reason for all the homesickness. The closer it gets the more I miss everyone's faces.
I am extremely grateful for how things have been going and well, missing home is normal. The funny part in all of this is that when I do get home, I know I will miss being here. As my dad would say, "it's a catch 22." I guess that with time, it will get a little easier between my two worlds. Wouldn't it be great if I could just combine the two and create a new country! All of my favorite people in the same place from here and there :). A girl can dream... sigh.
Here are a few quotes that I found on Pinterest that make being an expat more exciting and remind me that I am exactly where I am supposed to be :).
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Hi Jackie! I TOTALLY sympathize here. I spent the first four months living in England in such a whirlwind of busy-ness and intrigue, and then I got pummeled by a massive wave of homesickness. After I went home for Christmas it was like the reset button got pushed, and life was an adventure again. This cycle happened many, many times. It comes and goes, always, and the only thing you can really do is wait it out. (Or drink with friends, but then you end up drinking a lot...)
ReplyDeleteFunnily enough, now that I'm living at home again, I am homesick for London in the same way. I worry that I've opened some Pandora's box, and that I'll never feel completely at home anywhere. But then I think about having more than one place to call home, and how awesome that is.
I'm glad you're having such a great adventure. It takes a lot of courage to pick up and move to another country. And know that your home and your family are always there for you!
Thanks Cory!! Yeah it's definitely a rollercoaster and some days it doesn't hit as hard and others, it hits a little too much... but luckily, I'm able to take a quick flight home any chance I get. So that always makes me feel much better. Thanks for your awesome words, it's definitely nice to know I'm not alone!
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